Call me a Grinch if you will but two Christmas's ago I told Jude that Santa Clause is not real. It isn't that I wanted to steal that joy from his childhood - I just didn't want to lie to him. When Cody was younger he really believed in Santa. I mean this kid was so into Santa. One day we were at the grocery store and he said, "I know the Easter Bunny isn't real." I replied with an "ok". Then he said, "and I know the tooth fairy isn't real either." I smiled - thinking the kids at school had obviously gotten to him. I imagined what was next so I said...."and what about Santa." Suddenly the look on his face went from the 'I'm so cool because I figured you out to WHAT??? Santa - NO he IS real' look. I thought, oh crap. He said,"no, Santa is real....Right?" Oh boy. I said, "Sure Santa is real". He seemed relieved. But I felt really bad for lying to him. I knew it wouldn't be long before the kids at school told him the truth about Santa too and he'd know I lied to his face. So, when we got into the car I told him that Santa isn't real. He cried. And cried. How horrible. Thank God, I told him and not his friends. He would have been known as the kid who cried over Santa in front of his friends. So, when Jude was old enough to understand Christmas I told him Santa wasn't real. I told him he was like Buzz Lightyear or other cartoon characters. He seemed okay with it. We still hide the gifts and put them under the tree on Christmas eve, after the kids are in bed. We still hang stockings. And, yes, I have even taken my kids to sit on "Santa's" lap and get their picture taken (just a little sidenote - I don't take them to the expensive mall Santa but to this one that cost $3 and the money is donated to charity). I am not ANTI-Santa. I just didn't want to make this big DEAL about Santa and then have Jude (or any of the other kids) be upset when they find out something so major is really not real.
This year Jude started the season out by asking me if Santa is real. I guess because I brought it up before it is an issue now... I said the same thing I always say...NO. I know, I know, I am Mommy Grinch. I've explained to him that some other kids believe in Santa and told him that is okay. I also explained it is not his place to tell someone else Santa is not real or to ARGUE over it (that is the type of thing he would do). Well, yesterday Jude informed me that I was wrong. He said that Santa is real. I guess this is the first of many times my son will be influenced by his friends & TV over his mother. I am sad. But, by all means...he can believe in Santa all he wants. When he grows up and finds out the truth he'll know I was telling him the truth.
BTW....Just a little tid bit for those of you that read this far. When I was a kid I told my sister that Santa was not real and she also cried. I am so mean.
I also want to add that I will admit I have lied to Jude before. I am not trying to be all "holier than thou". It just seems like such a big deal anymore. PLUS...I really want Jude and the girls to know what Christmas is really about - Jesus NOT Santa.
3 comments:
I admire that you have the nerve to tell Jude the truth. I on the other hand talk about Santa and act as if he is real. To me he is. Santa is the excitement of waiting to see there faces on Christmas morning when they open their presents. The fun of hiding them and sneeking around to shop. The fun of watching them squirm in bed trying to get to sleep before he gets there. When Isaac asked me last year if there is a Santa I told him "Santa is magic, if you believe in Santa you believe in the magic of him, the magic of Christmas". This seemed to work, I did not lie. However for you Christmas is much more about Jesus then it is in my family. I think what you did was fine. I don't think you are a scrooge. I think you are a caring Mom who wants her children to trust her. I applaude your decision.
You're a mean one, Mrs. Grinch. How do you sleep at night knowing that you are scarring your child for the rest of their lives? OMG, your kidding right? You are NOT the GRINCH you are realistic and teaching your kids to deal with disappointments at a young age. If people think you're the grinch it their problem.
In some ways I wish that I had done that with our boys. My oldest will be 10 in a week, he still believes. The older they get the harder it is to keep a secret. I enjoy the fact that they have kept their innocence about Santa for this long. Kids grow up fast enough these days. I do get this feeling that when he does find out that he is going to be mad at me for lying to him.
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