Tuesday, November 06, 2007

The Story of Your Life.....In Photos.

It has been a while since I wrote something deep and thoughtful. I am feeling somewhat reflective this morning so I am going to make you think. I mentioned to you that my sisters mother in law passed away two weeks ago (that is Ivan's Mom). I've found when someone you know well dies, it really makes you evaluate life, at least it does for me. At the calling hours they had something that I have been seeing more and more (at the last three calling hours I have been to). It was one of those digital photo frames filled with photos of Patty. It was such a nice thing to have in the room. Photos of happy moments, family bonding, goofiness and smiles. It made me start thinking about what my slide show would look like. And not just if the happy moments in life are being captured on film but I started thinking about if I have those silly, happy times where I just let go of the daily grind and enjoy life. I came to the conclusion that I don't do it enough. I'd bet most people don't. There was one particular picture of Patty and Indy pretending to fly. It was so sweet. I choked up when I saw it, I guess it made her death and the impending absence so real to me. How much her children and grandchildren were going to be affected her death. The whole life and death thing just gets me. I know people who are fighting for their lives right now, who always have a smile on their face or a laugh in their belly. And I know people who are perfectly healthy that are just going through the motions. Isn't it ironic? At the funeral home lots of people were standing around talking about Patty and her life. They were talking about the last few years and the Geocaching she did. They talked about the children she raised (two that she didn't birth herself), the fun stuff, her personality. I didn't hear anyone saying her house was clean or dirty. I didn't hear anyone saying if she stayed on top of her laundry or dishes. In fact, I have been in her home many times and although I tried to visualize it, I can't even remember if she ever had dishes stacked in the sink or if she didn't. But I do remember her staying up until the wee hours of the night talking and joking. I know keeping things in order is important for all practical purposes but spending most of your time on it is literally wasting your life. That is what I believe. I could go on and on about this. But I have one more thing to talk about before I wrap this up. Flowers. Yes, flowers. Heather (my sister) kept saying how Patty just loved flowers, any type. Lots of people sent flowers. Big and expensive arrangements. Beautiful baskets and sprays of color. Patty would have loved them....when she was alive. I never sent Patty flowers. In fact, I don't think I have EVER sent a living person $66 worth of flowers. I think it is awful. So I am going to make an effort to buy flowers for people when they are living. I don't want to buy flowers for a dead person ever again. I think a single rose or a live plant for the family is appropriate to show your love and support for the family. So, if you get a big bouquet of flowers from me, just know they are your would be funeral flowers. Oh, BTW...If I send them it doesn't mean I think you are going to die right now....just some day.

Now that I am done going on and on....get out there and live your life to the fullest. Say I love you and sent those flowers while you have a chance! Start working on your life in pictures. Have a silly moment (or two or three) today. Pretend to fly, tell a joke and smile.


Anonymous said...

okay...where is that box of Kleenex?

You just never know when your entire world will be turned upside down. Sometimes you can have the opportunity to "prepare and say goodbye", if there is such a thing...and sometimes it's just a moment. Sometimes the person has lived their life and is ready to go "home", many times it's just way too soon-there was so much living left and other times they never even took their first breath outside of the womb. I don't believe one is any worse then the other. They all stink. But our loving God has a purpose for all of it.

You are soooooo right D....you must focus on what matters. Who cares whether your house is perfect, who cares...... Live every day, every moment to the fullest. Love life. Love your family. Love your friends. Love God!!!

I'll stop now or I'll be here all day.


Anonymous said...

tears-just tears at work.thanks for it into perspective for me.

shawna said...

You could'nt have said it more perfect. I think the flowers for the living is a great idea. Who needs them when we are gone.
If there is one thing I learned through my experience its that worrying about others judgment is a waste of time. Live life.